Fake News

OxFrenzy: Panic on our Streets

OxFrenzy: Panic on our Streets

13th November 2017

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Fake News:

Students across the university were confronted with a shocking scene this morning. Upon their customary morning browse, many Facebook users were aghast to find that… Read More ›

Medical student claims boyfriend is ‘very useful’ for practising surgery

Medical student claims boyfriend is ‘very useful’ for practising surgery

29th October 2017

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Fake News:

A young medical student at Christ Church has been praised for her astonishing commitment to her medical degree. Judged an ‘extraordinary, able young lady’ and… Read More ›

Interviews moved on to sports grounds to ensure ‘level playing field’, university announces

Interviews moved on to sports grounds to ensure ‘level playing field’, university announces

29th October 2017

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Fake News:

Oxford University has announced new measures to ensure equality of access, following accusations of ‘social apartheid’ in its admissions policy by David Lammy MP.  … Read More ›

Bridge VIP Now Part of SW10, Sadiq Khan declares

Bridge VIP Now Part of SW10, Sadiq Khan declares

21st October 2017

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Fake News:

London Mayor, Sadiq Khan, announced today that Bridge VIP, or Varyingly Important Public-school-kids, will become part of SW10 in new reforms to the city’s post code… Read More ›

BREAKING NEWS: Cherwell Retracts Entire Newspaper

BREAKING NEWS: Cherwell Retracts Entire Newspaper

21st October 2017

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Fake News:

In a shock decision, Cherwell has decided to retract every single article it has ever written. The ‘independent’ ‘news organisation’ has since deleted its website,… Read More ›

Oxford ‘Night-Climber’ Caught Wanking Outside College Wife’s Room

Oxford ‘Night-Climber’ Caught Wanking Outside College Wife’s Room

19th October 2017

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Fake News:

The notorious student known only as the ‘Oxford Night-Climber’ has been found passed out this morning, with a college tie roped tightly around his neck, and… Read More ›

Imposter Syndrome Highest Amongst LMH Freshers, Survey Finds.

Imposter Syndrome Highest Amongst LMH Freshers, Survey Finds.

19th October 2017

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Fake News:

A survey conducted by VERSA’s campaign for student satisfaction found that record numbers of freshers at Lady Margaret Hall suffered from ‘Imposter Syndrome’. The survey… Read More ›

‘Oxlove’ Proven More Successful Than ‘E-Harmony’, ‘Match.com’ And Actually Going Outside, Study Finds

‘Oxlove’ Proven More Successful Than ‘E-Harmony’, ‘Match.com’ And Actually Going Outside, Study Finds

19th October 2017

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Fake News:

Researchers at the University of Oxford’s social sciences department have revealed that the lonely-hearts Facebook page ‘Oxlove’ is more effective in matching couples together than… Read More ›

Straight White Man refuses treatment for splinter

Straight White Man refuses treatment for splinter

20th March 2017

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Fake News:

Unlikely Wadham undergrad John Luke Smith has reportedly survived after being picking up a nasty shard of wood in his thumb from a dodgy oar… Read More ›

girl

VERSA: Wadham Warden calls JCR president “silly special snowflake millennial”

21st February 2017

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Fake News:

Disclaimer: none of these events actually occurred, and this is a work of fiction. According to sources, the warden muttered, “try it, you silly special snowflake… Read More ›